WHERE STRESS COMES FROM: The Real Reasons Behind Your Discomfort

WHERE STRESS COMES FROM: the real reasons behind your discomfort

Do you happen to feel stressed out?
Maybe even when you’re not doing anything so demanding…
You don’t have an immediate deadline…
There’s no one pressuring you at that moment…
And yet… you feel tension inside…
As if something were always on…
And then you say:
I’m stressed
But… what does it really mean to be stressed?
Because we often use this word to describe everything,
but we never stop to understand what’s really going on inside us.
And what if stress wasn’t just one thing?
If you stop and look closely,
you’ll realize that we call stress very different situations:
When you have too much to do
When you don’t know what’s going to happen
When you don’t understand a person
When you feel stuck
When you don’t know where you’re going…
And yet… we always use the same word…
And here’s something important:
Stress isn’t just one thing…
It’s a signal
A signal that something in your internal system isn’t in balance.

Where stress comes from: why the body reacts as if there were danger

From the brain’s perspective,
stress is a survival response.
When the brain perceives a threat,
it feels uncertainty or a loss of control.
A small structure called the amygdala is activated.
It functions as an alarm system.
At that point, the body releases cortisol, preparing to react.
It’s our natural system, the one that allowed us to survive
throughout our evolution.
The problem is that today this system
is activated even when there’s no real danger:
an email… a message…
a silence… a doubt…
a thought…
and the body reacts as if there were a real threat.
So… it’s not just too much to do…
it’s something more subtle…
You can be sitting on the couch
doing nothing
and still feel tense…
or you can have a busy day
but feel centered.
Then the question becomes:
Where does stress really come from?
To understand it…
we need to start seeing stress
for what it really is…
not a single thing
but a collection of different states…
and in this video
I’ll help you recognize the different
faces of stress
so you can begin to understand what’s really going on inside you…
now…
stop for a moment…
and while you listen,
try asking yourself:
what type of stress do I recognize most in my life?
We’ve seen that stress isn’t a single thing…
and perhaps there’s something even more important here…
as Jon Kabat-Zinn writes in his book Full Catastrophe Living:
it’s not so much the stressful events themselves…
but how we see them and relate to them
that determines how much they affect us.
It’s not just what happens
it’s how we’re experiencing it
but then…
what are we really experiencing when we say
I’m stressed?

WATCH THE VIDEO – English Subtitles Available – Activate CC.

Stress and the brain: types of stress: overload, uncertainty, control and direction

We can begin to see it more clearly
if we divide it into different states:
The first is the most recognizable

stress from overload

when you have too much to do
when everything piles up
and you feel like you don’t have enough time
deadlines… commitments… constant demands…
and the mind never stops…
here the stress arises from excess…
too much to manage…
too much to keep together…
and the body remains constantly active…
as if it could never shut down.
Then there’s a more subtle stress…

the stress from uncertainty

that arises when you don’t know what will happen…
when you wait for a response…
a call… a message… an outcome…
and you’re left suspended…
you can’t act…
you can’t decide…
you can only wait…
and that waiting becomes tension
because the mind can’t predict…

the stress from lack of control

another type of stress
is when you feel like you have no control:
when things happen…
but they don’t depend on you…
you can’t change them…
you can’t influence them…
and you feel at the mercy…
here the stress doesn’t arise from what happens
but from the fact that you can’t do anything about it…
and this creates a deep tension…
then there’s a stress that’s even more difficult to recognize…

the stress from lack of direction

that arises when you don’t know where you’re going…
there’s nothing wrong on the outside
but inside you feel restless
it’s not fatigue…
it’s disorientation…
as if you were moving forward
but without a clear direction
and the mind, when it doesn’t see a After
it goes on alert
and even rest becomes restless…

Relational stress and mental stress: when tension comes from ambiguity and thoughts

Then there’s relational stress…
which arises in relationships
when you feel something isn’t right
but isn’t said…
when words don’t come…
or come in the wrong way…
when you don’t understand what the other person is feeling…
Here, stress arises from ambiguity
because the mind seeks clarity
but finds silence.

Where stress comes from: Rumination

And then there’s the more invisible one,
the one that arises inside:
mental stress…
constant thoughts… analysis… doubts… self-criticism…
even when everything outside is still…
inside, nothing turns off…
Here, stress doesn’t come from the world
but from how the mind interprets it and often… it’s not just one of these it’s a combination:
a bit of uncertainty…
a bit of overload…
a bit of lack of direction…
and the mind becomes saturated…
and then we say:
I’m stressed
But if we begin to distinguish
what type of stress we’re experiencing,
we also begin to see something different
not a single problem
but a system we can understand.

Why stress is so common today

We’ve seen the different faces of stress,
but there’s another important question:
why do we feel it so much today?
Our brain hasn’t changed that much
over the last few thousand years.
It’s an ancient system
designed to survive immediate dangers.
But the world we live in today
is completely different…
We no longer have just physical threats…
but continuous stimuli…
constant information…
invisible requests…
and the brain doesn’t make much difference…

Where stress comes from: Modern triggers

we live in a constant flow…
notifications… messages… emails… content…
there’s never a real stop…
and the nervous system remains active…
even when the body is still.
We also live in an era
where everything changes rapidly…
work… relationships… social context…
and this creates a constant state of uncertainty…
we never really know what will happen,
and the mind struggles to find stability.

Where stress comes from: competition

Then there’s another element,
more silent, but very powerful:
comparison…
we constantly see other people’s lives…
results… images of perfection…
and without realizing it,
we begin to compare ourselves…
and this creates tension
because the mind enters into competition
even when it doesn’t need to.
The brain is increasingly active…
more information…
more decisions…
more thoughts…
and fewer spaces of silence…
but it’s precisely in silence
that the system regulates itself…
without pauses… stress accumulates…

The real secret

There’s a final aspect
that we often don’t consider:
we’re increasingly in the mind
and less and less in the body…
we think… we analyze… we anticipate…
but we don’t feel…
and when we lose contact with the body,
we also lose the first sign of stress,
and then we notice it
only when it’s already high…
so…

Where stress comes from: Not just a personal issue

it’s not just a personal issue,
it’s also the world we live in,
a fast-paced, uncertain, and stimuli-filled world,
that keeps our system constantly active.
But understanding this
isn’t about feeling overwhelmed
it’s about doing something different
because if stress is a system
we can start to regulate it.

How to regulate stress: recognizing what is really happening

We’ve seen that stress isn’t just one thing
it’s a system
and so the question becomes:
what can we really do?
We often look for quick fixes
relax… switch off… don’t think about it…
but it doesn’t work that way…
because you can’t turn off stress
without understanding what’s creating it…

The first step

is to recognize:
What kind of stress am I experiencing right now?
Is it overload?
Is it uncertainty?
Is it a lack of control?
Is it a lack of direction?
Naming it helps change everything
because the mind
when it sees clearly
calms down…

The second step

is to create space
not add more things
but remove…
less stimuli…
less mental overload…
more real breaks…
even a few minutes make a difference.
Stress lives in the body
but often we stay in the mind…
and then the body stays activated
without discharging.
Breathing slowly…
Feeling your body…
Slowing down…
It’s not something trivial
It’s regulation.

Understanding stress: listening, naming and transforming it

Then there’s something even deeper…
Giving direction
not to your entire life
but to the present moment:
What am I doing now?
Where am I going, even just today?
The mind doesn’t need to know everything…
but it needs direction…
and when it finds it,
it relaxes…
and maybe…

The point isn’t to eliminate stress but to learn to listen to it

Stress isn’t always an enemy
sometimes it’s a sign
that something needs attention.
If you start to stop
to listen
to distinguish what you feel…
it changes.
It doesn’t become easy right away
but it becomes clearer.
And when something is clear
it’s not so scary anymore…
Stress isn’t just something to fight
It’s something to understand
And maybe even transform…

This article explores the real reasons where stress comes from and the different types of stress.
It shows how the body responds to different states of alert and is part of a series of articles specifically dedicated to stress and all its implications.

We created this series to explore the relationship between stress, mind, body, and the nervous system through neuroscience, and to explain how mindfulness can help, showing practical approaches.

You can find the related video playlist on:

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